Roids were all the rage at the Enhanced Games

In Las Vegas, the blazing sun beats down on a makeshift Olympic-length pool. Cody Miller stands on the starting block of lane one. His arms are raised in victory. MC Hammer’s “U Can’t Touch This” thumps over the loudspeakers as he rips off his swimming cap, throwing it to the ground. Miller lets out a guttural scream, muscles and veins bulging. He’s just won the men’s 50m breaststroke at the inaugural Enhanced Games. Miller’s wallet is $250,000 fatter than it was 26.55 seconds ago — a new personal best time for the two-time Olympic medalist. Is Miller’s win thanks to his polyurethane swimsuit, which was banned after the 2008 Olympics as a form of technological doping? Or was it his personalized protocol of performance-enhancing drugs, which are verboten in almost every other competition? One thing is certain: Miller isn’t ashamed of his decision to dope. He’s been talking about it for months and has the enthusiastic endorsement of his doctors, coaches, and family. “I just shaved seven-tenths off my best at 34,” he says, when asked how “enhancing” has affected his performance. A Vegas hometown hero, Miller left professional swimming in December 2024 after setting a personal record at his final clean meet. “The last lap, my body shut down, stopped working,” he said in a vlog explaining his retirement. The video ends with Miller plugging his availability for Cameo, local swim meets, speaking engagements, and his YouTube channel. …